Introduction -- Prologue: Greetings from La Jolla -- An unwilling host -- Vertigo -- Boy meets girl -- "Are you gay?" -- "Remember: always carry a dime to call the police!" -- The vegetable monster -- "This is not Romper Room, sweetie. This is a place of business" -- Most likely to be remembered -- The farewell party -- Epilogue: Greetings from South Wardsboro.
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